What Up Me?

I realize I’ve been posting less frequently and without much content lately.  No one really care, but me care.

I’m so tired of my job. I’m sure that if I wasn’t leaving I’d still like it, but lately every request has been irritating and I’m a grumpy goose. It’s senioritis for sure and most of my office knows so the fun of keeping it a secret and pulling an Irish exit has vanished.

I’m also crazy stressed about my grad school finances. About a week ago, it occurred to me that I might not receive enough aid to cover my tuition, much less my expenses. I never thought about it at UNC because it was in-state with comparably low tuition and I received enough aid for housing and I could work part time to cover the rest of my living expenses. Now, I don’t know how it’s all going to work. I just bought a car and I’m finally on my own insurance- how can I afford these things plus rent if I don’t receive enough financial aid? So now I’m coming up with alternative routes but they’re not super helpful. Like, I could move to Bloomington but defer my enrollment until I can afford it. Or I could move to part-time status so I can work full time. None of these sound appealing (though I recognize it’s a reality for many other people.) I’ve talked to my temp agent here about connecting me with an agent out there so I might be able to get a part time job in an office. I’m guaranteed 10 hours of academic office work as part of my scholarship but I can probably work in 20 hours off campus and still do my school work. And then even at minimum wage I could afford rent and my car payment.

I just don’t know. I wish I had considered all of this before I applied- all I was thinking about was the cost of tuition.

But more about my car-

I love driving it and a lot of it is very familiar of my family’s old smart car, but there are some things I totally forgot about. For example, road rage.

I’ve been driving it for three days and have almost been hit twice, have been cut off within an inch of my car, have been flipped off, and tailgated almost constantly when I’m in my car. It’s like people have something to prove- or like, this is the driving equivalent to when tell someone I’m vegetarian and they react with something like “oh so you think you’re better than me?” Eye roll emoji. It’s a little scary but it goes as fast as other cars. My only complaint is that when it’s in automatic transmission mode it takes a little over a second to switch gears. I haven’t yet tried to drive with it in manual. (For those of you that don’t know, the smart car is both manual and automatic.)

Other things on my mind-

My current apartment is the only place I’ve rented where I feel the need to worry about damages and repairs. Gertie, though normally a very good dog, ripped two wholes in the carpet. I am having them patched for about $100. There’s also a crack in the paneling of the microwave so I bought a replacement door for $140. And there are a few other things I can’t predict they’ll notice when I check out. Also, what if they fuck me over on cleaning? Like how can they prove how much time they’ll need to clean it or that  they cleaned the entire time? They have a whole list of typical charges so I know what they look for, I don’t know if they’ll be honest. I’m doing the repairs on my own so they can’t overcharge me to replace the microwave door or the carpet, but I really don’t want to spend more than a month’s rent in repairs. I also could not find a line in the lease that says there is a cap to how much they can charge me at once. Super stressful.

And what is complaining about my apartment if I don’t talk about my roommate. Last Monday she said she’d be moving out that Saturday and insisted that I should prorate her rent because the apartment building prorates. First of all, she’s renting from me and not the apartment. Secondly, she’s moving out before the end of the lease but she’s still obligated to fill the terms of the lease. Third, she gave me fewer than a week’s notice that she was moving out early so I could not make arrangements regarding the internet plan and other shared costs and her lease stipulates one month’s notice or 2 months rent. So I explained this and that I would prorate from the 18th, which to her credit she eventually understood. And now, 4 days after her claimed move out date, she is still in the apartment. Nothing of hers has been packed. She’s made literally no effort that I can see that would suggest she is moving out anytime soon.
So where does that leave me? No matter what time she moves out, she will still be under a month’s notice. My original plan was to prorate her rent plus fixed costs until the 18th but prorate the variable costs (water, electric) until she leaves. But not knowing when that will be makes me wonder if that’s the right way to go.

I’ve packed up a fair amount of my stuff. I’ve donated a few bags of clothing, I boxed up my DVDs and games (Also, I have so many fucking DVDs. How did I get so out of control?) and I’ve been going through my personal items and donating/tossing a lot of it. It’s taking a lot of time because I have to give myself permission to either throw away or donate for each thing because I feel so intensely guilty about rejecting gifts given to me over the years. It feels like a betrayal somehow. But my hope is to be all packed up a week before move out with the exception of my big furniture.

ALSO am thinking of having a cleaning party that involves bagels, tequila, beers, and pizza to offer an incentive to help me clean. Nothing will be gross, I’ll have a whole list of things to do and I am awesome at delegation. Also if anyone wants to hold onto some crap for me for free….


I’m going out to Bloomington in the next few weeks (15 hour drive) to tour apartments and see the campus. Living with roommates is getting less appealing by the day and it seems like in a lot of places a 1 bedroom isn’t much more than a 2 bedroom. There’s one I am particularly interested in, however the move in date is the first day of my mandatory math camp. Am thinking, maybe my family can move me in while I’m there (but that’s douchey). I don’t know how else we’d do it. I am also looking for places that are open earlier- I’m sure something will work out.






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